You've been afraid all your life. Speak up, and be shouted down. Wake up, but don't get up. Don't breath, or they'll hear you. A thousand prying eyes is the last thing you want.
You've never been good between one and another, but before the masses you are the thinker and they are historians with broken pens.
When your heart opens to another it is drowned by waxing terror and waning intellect. Your pen understands you, and you are broken. It says what you cannot, and gives you every opportunity in hopes that your rubber hands become iron fists.
Reward it's patience. show the opposition that there is hell on earth, and that none will be spared. Gather the other half of your heart and become whole. Seize the world's splendors! Deny the lamb and his hypocrisies. Revel as the goat in the pleasures of the flesh, or shamble listlessly evermore!